[Upside Down by Jack Johnson playing]
Who's to say What's impossible
Well, they forgot This world keeps spinning
And with each new day
I can feel a change in everything
And as the surface breaks, reflections fade
But in some ways, they remain the same
And as my mind begins to spread its wings
There's no stopping curiosity
I want to turn the whole thing upside down
I'll find the things they say just can't be found
I'll share this love I find with everyone
We'll sing and dance to Mother Nature's songs
I don't want this feeling to go away
[Growling]
Who's to say I can't do everything
Well, I can try
And as I roll along I begin to find
Things aren't always just what they seem
I want to turn the whole thing upside down
I'll find the things they say just can't be found
I'll share this love I find with everyone
We'll sing and dance to Mother Nature's songs
This world keeps spinning
And there's no time to waste
Well, it all keeps spinning, spinning round and round
And upside down
Who's to say what's impossible and can't be found
I don't want this feeling to go away
Please don't go away
Is this how it's supposed to be
TED: Now, as I was saying, life was a constant struggle for survival.
Australopithecus had no time to enjoy himself...
because around every corner was danger.
BOY 1: Way to go. BOY 2: Oh, good one.
It wasn't until an amazing discovery...
that man was able to take time and enjoy life.
And why was that?
What made Ogg and Grogg's life so much better?
A video game? No.
The lnternet? No.
A rocket sled? A mountain of chocolate.
Star stickers? No.
Look. No, no, that wasn't a real question. Peanut butter?
That's right.
Fire.
[Ted exclaiming]
Look at that. Impressive, huh?
Miss Dunlop, why do we have to come to this boring museum every single week?
It's not boring. It's very interesting.
This led to hot dinners.
Eventually became the microwave. BOY: Three, two, one.
Oh! Oh, no.
Hot. Fire's hot.
Yes. Where was l?
Hey, is that a real spear? BOY: Can we play with it?
Kids, a museum is a place where we observe. We don't play.
This stinks. What else can we do?
Yeah, this is boring. MAGGlE: Children, be polite.
Lunchtime! Yeah, lunch.
TED: Lunchtime? It's only 9:00 a.m.
Buddy system. Stay with your buddies.
Oh, well, each kid has a buddy so they can all keep track of each other.
Everyone needs a partner, right?
Oh, yeah. I'm not following.
Well....
Lungfish! Excuse me?
Next Thursday, I'm going to talk to your class about the lungfish...
the closest living relative of the tetrapods.
It's pretty great. I look forward to hearing it.
You know, I look forward to all your Thursday lectures.
I wish today was Thursday.
I mean, I know that it's Thursday. Don't worry.
I just meant, when it's not, I wish it was. It's not a big deal.
Here.
I should go catch up to my lungfish. I mean, class.
[Whispering] Way to go, Maggie. Way to go.
I'll see you next week, Miss Dunlop.
Oh, how embarrassing.
Ted? Mr. Bloomsberry.
Walk with me, Ted.
I'm afraid that Ogg and Grogg, all of our friends here...
they're just not bringing in the crowds like they used to.
What do you mean?
It breaks my heart, but I have to sell the museum. We're broke.
Broke? Mr. Bloomsberry, the museum can't close!
I have no choice, Ted. Museum attendance is down.
No one's buying anything from the gift shop.
Even the glow-in-the-dark star stickers?
Even the glow-in-the-dark star stickers.
Man, I love those.
I especially love the Milky Way.... Wait!
What will happen to the museum?
Well, I'm glad you asked. Junior?
It'll be torn down and a parking lot put in its place...
with high hourly rates and no daily maximums.
Ka-ching!
The world doesn't need another parking lot.
The world needs a place where kids' brains can grow.
Exactly. That's why I'm thinking...
they can grow trying to count all the spaces in the new parking lot.
Come on. How fun is that?
He's not serious, is he? Well--
It's time, Father. We're not going to get a better offer.
I know. I know.
Wait. What if we did something?
What if we got an amazing new exhibit?
You know, Ted, you need to worry about finding an amazing new job.
Well, hold on, Junior. But I was just trying.... Oh, great.
Ted, if you have an idea, now is the time to speak up. What exhibit?
Yes, what exhibit?
TED: It's the.... Yes?
The famous and.... Yes.
And rare, of course.... Yes. Yes.
The incredible.... Come on.
Spit it out. Don't be shy, Ted. Come on.
What about the Lost Shrine of Zagawa?
Oh, my goodness.
I'm sorry. "The lost...." You lost me at, "the lost."
It's an ancient idol.
Twenty tons of granite...
carved by 1,000 craftsmen over a 100 years.
I had all the charts ready.
I was all set to go to Africa when something happened.
Slips my mind.
Hello, how about the birth of your only son? That would be me.
Yes, then I began another adventure, raising Junior.
Well, now that that's done, you can finally finish what you've started...
which is bringing home.... Yeah! The Lost Shrine of Zagawa.
You'll put this museum on the map.
I'll need a team of 10 men. Oh, at least 10.
It's a four-day hike into the jungle.
You go, girl.
I mean, sir.
We'll be cutting through heavy brush for 12 hours a day.
Look out. Here comes the Bloomsberry Express!
Yes! Yes! Next stop archeological fame and fortune!
I'm going to discover the Lost Shrine of Zagawa!
A little help here. Hey, watch it!
I forgot something.
I am really, really old.
Can I have the Bloomsberry Express pull into the reality station...
and sign here, initial here. Nope, not there.
Wait! I guess I could go.
Did I just say that? I can't do that.
I don't even ride the bus. Maybe they didn't hear me.
I'm sorry, sir. You were saying?
Excellent idea, Ted.
He did hear me.
Him? You've got to be kidding me. Ted is not an explorer.
He raises a good point. Nonsense.
With my maps and my journals, a six-year-old could find the shrine.
Thank you, I think.
Come on. Let's get you ready for your big adventure.
Now, Ted, the journal won't take you right to the idol.
It won't? No, you have to use your instincts.
About that, sir, I don't have any. Don't be silly. It'll be fun.
Sorry, Ted.
But that's as close as you're ever going to get...
to the precious Lost Shrine of Zaga-wah-wah-wah....
Why does my father like you best? It's not fair. I've got the ponytail.
Okay, Ted, the trick is to look like you know what you're doing.
Now, where's the door?
Yellow? Six dozen yellow suits?
Tony, what, are you goofy? We can't sell these things.
Hey, me goofy? Forget about it.
The big guy says move them, we move them.
Oh, yeah, sure, but what kind of meatball would buy these?
[Bell tinkling]
Excuse me?
I'm here to be professionally outfitted for a jungle expedition.
[Whispering] Showtime.
[ln an Australian accent] Good day, mate.
You've stepped into the right place. Isn't that right, Nigel?
I'll say it is, Steve-O. Finally, a real adventurer to suit up.
So do you like the color yellow? Yellow?
Yeah, what, are you goofy? Yellow's the new khaki.
Mate. Really? Well, okay.
You've got to be kidding. Look at that get-up.
Hello, who are you, the six-foot banana?
"The new khaki."
Thank you! Thank you very much!
I look like an idiot.
TED: Edu. Yes, sir?
Don't worry the other men, but we're hopelessly lost.
Sir, your book is upside down.
Oh. Oh, good catch. Carry on. Thank you, sir.
MAN 1: Wow. What is it? MAN 2: That's interesting.
Look at this. Beautiful.
Look at the color.
Edu, do you see this?
Yes, it's-- Exciting! We are so close.
Edu. Mr. Ted.
It says here "Zagawa" means enlightenment.
I know, sir. I live here. Oh, right.
Did you know the statue we're looking for is a giant monkey?
Yes, sir. I live here. Right again.
Oh, a rhino. Sir?
Stand aside, men. Mr. Ted.
This is a tranquilizer gun. I'm just going to put him to sleep.
That's not a rhino. That's a....
[Edu exclaiming]
Nice shot, Mr. Ted.
[Snoring]
Oops! Okay, let's break for lunch...
for the next four to six hours...
or longer, depending on how much he weighs.
I should probably make a sandwich for Edu.
He'll have quite an appetite and a headache when he wakes up.
This is really good.
[Chattering]
Hey!
Oh, a monkey. Hey, there, little guy.
Can I have my hat, please?
I kind of need my hat.
Sun's hot, and I freckle. Not the good kind either. I blotch.
So please, my hat.
That's the one, all right.
[Chattering happily]
Hello. Anybody in there?
Peekaboo.
Aboo. Aboo.
Well, look at that. A monkey who likes to play peek-a-boo.
Hey, this was fun, my little friend, but, sorry, I've got to go.
I wonder if Edu's up yet.
Hey! Come back here.
You can run, but you can't hide. I'll catch up. I am unstoppable.
That's right. I can run all night.
All day and all night. There's nothing that can stop....
Cramp! Cramp. Cramp can stop me. Why the cramp? Extra-bad cramp, too.
What? What....
[Chattering happily]
Okay, I have an idea.
We'll trade. Sandwich for the hat.
On three.
One, two, three!
[Grunting]
Okay.
We're not really making any progress here.
Okay. Oh, yeah.
[Giggling]
191, 192, 193, 194.
Not now, monkey.
196, 197, one-ninety-monkey.
199, 200.
Okay, "Look for two mufuti bushes, and you will find X."
There, sir. Mufutis. Good eye, Edu.
Here, hold this.
There it is. It's awesome. It's spectacular.
It's.... Gone?
What? This can't be it.
EDU: Did you find it, sir?
It's supposed to be huge. But that isn't huge, okay?
That's the opposite of huge. I need the giant monkey.
Who knew it was actual size?
Wait. This looks like ancient Swatabi.
"Turn your eye to the light.
"Go from blindness to sight."
That's a clue.
"Turn your eye to the light."
All right, I'm looking directly into the sun.
It's very bright. It's starting to sting. Not going to lie to you.
Okay, now.... Now, it's burning, and it's continuing....
Oh, I singed my cornea. Oh, I'm blind.
[Exclaiming]
Okay, water, H2O, just a little liquid refreshment, please.
Oh, there it is. Oh, sweet relief. Thank you, Edu.
Edu, Edu, Edu.
All right, men, let's pick it up.
I'll be over here until my vision returns.
I traveled 10,000 miles for a paper weight?
What am I going to tell Mr. Bloomsberry?
[Cell phone ringing]
Bloomsberry? Wow. Strong signal.
Hello? Ted, it's me, Have you found it yet?
Yeah, I'm looking at it right now.
Oh, that's great, Is it gigantic?
Well, there is a size issue, sir.
I'll send you a photo so you can see for yourself.
I can't wait,
Do you see it, sir?
I do.
Oh, sir. Are you crying?
It's supposed to be 40 feet tall,
I'll explain it all when I get back.
No need to, I can see it right here,
[Dial tone buzzing]
I can't believe it.
Do you see that, Junior?
It's even bigger than I ever imagined!
Well, that's impossible. I.... I can't believe he....
[Sarcastically] Hurray. We're saved.
EDU: Mr. Ted, time to go.
You know what? Keep the hat.
Hey, don't look so sad.
It's the new khaki. It's true. Bye.
[Car engine starting]
[Men chattering]
TED: Edu, I can't find the seat belt. Will that be a problem?
Not for me.
Edu, it's okay to use the break. Oh, relax.
I want to be where the talk of the town
Is about last night when the sun went down
Yeah, and the trees all dance
And the warm wind blows in the same old sound
And the trouble I find is that the trouble finds me
I'm beginning to find it begins with a dream
And a feeling I get when I look and I see
That this world is a puzzle Find all of the pieces
And put it all together Then I'll rearrange it
I'll follow it forever And maybe
Maybe now the water below gives a gift to the sky
And the clouds give back every time they cry
Make the grass grow green beneath my toes
And if the sun comes out
Gonna paint a picture all about
The colors I've been dreaming of
TED: Mr. Bloomsberry...
I would just like to say in my defense that....
Sir, when we set out...
on certain adventures in life...
sometimes.... Sometimes, they don't quite go as planned.
I'm extra sorry.
Oh, boy. Maybe I could just work on this ship...
be a deckhand or a chef.
I'm so glad I upgraded.
Oh, the knee! There's the forehead!
Knee-forehead combo.
[Groaning]
[Chattering happily]
No, no, no, not the honey-roasted goodness.
[Thudding]
And there's the head again.
[Ship horn blowing]
Hey, it's a monkey with a hat!
I'll just go ahead and put that under "Miscellaneous."
[People Watching by Jack Johnson playing]
Well, I'm just people watching
The other people watching me
CABBY 1: Where you going, Yellow? TED: Bloomsberry Museum, please.
You know, I'll give you $10 extra if you'll stop calling me Yellow.
You got it, Sunshine.
There really ain't no use in stopping
What nobody never told me not to do
So I'll keep people watching
Watching me now Finding my way back to you
CABBY 2: For crying out loud, lady, there's no screaming in cabs.
We're all as lonely as we wanted to be
MAN: Hey, yo, over here.
Just as lonely as we wanted to be
[Gasping]
Wait! What does that say?
"The Lost Shrine of Zagawa"? "Gigantic"?
Oh, that's not right at all. "The shrine is 40 feet tall"?
I know. That bad boy's a monster.
I can't wait to see it. I'm taking the whole family.
Yeah, well, I hope you get seats up front.
CABBY 3: Yo! Over here!
[Man gasping]
[Dogs yelping]
CABBY 4: Puppies!
No, watch the claws. Watch the claws.
Yeah, sure, I've seen everything in this town.
Oh, yeah, monkey? Seen it.
[Truck horn blaring]
I'm as lonely as I wanted to be
We're as lonely as we wanted to be
[Horns blaring]
We're as lonely as we wanted to be
CABBY 1 : Construction. Of all the luck....
You know what? Sir, I'll just get out right here. Right, this will work.
I'm just going to go home, call Mr. Bloomsberry...
and explain everything, right? Sure. Whatever. $1 2.50, pal.
[Horn blaring]
Sorry.
Okay, I'm moving.
MAN: Watch out! Hey, what, you couldn't see me? Right.
[Woman screaming]
Hey, there, lvan.
[Grunting]
Good talk. Take care.
[Sighing]
Home.
Okay, I just need two seconds of quiet.
[Phone ringing]
All right, I didn't mean literally.
Hello? Ted!
Hi, Mr. Bloomsberry. I just walked in the door.
Well, get down here. All the news reporters are here.
I've arranged a press conference just for you.
You're the hero of the moment,
Oh, have you seen the surprise? Surprise, sir?
Look out your front window.
My window? Yes, yes, take a looksy,
Okay. You're really going to like it,
Well, what do you think?
[Chuckling] Speechless, I knew you'd love it,
Ted, you deserved it, I don't know what I would have done,
You single-handedly saved the museum,
Mr. Bloomsberry, I have to tell you something.
Yes, I'm all ears,
It's about.... Yes, what?
My hat? Sure, wear your hat,
Wear your best suit, Just get down here,
There can't be two hats like that.
[Sniffing]
Pet?
Pet.
My hat? My yellow hat?
No, no, no, this can't be the same hat.
It's the same hat.
And the same monkey.
Wait! You followed me all the way from Africa...
[Chattering]
to play peekaboo.
[Elevator dinging]
No.
No again.
No.
No. No. No.
No. No. No. No.
Hold the phone.
No, no, no, I don't want to play peekaboo.
[Knocking on door]
Open up, 17-B. I know you're in there.
Open up! Ivan don't like to wait!
What? Oh, no. Monkey. Monkey. Come on, open the door!
Where are you?
Oh, hi. Ivan!
I'm smelling pet.
Pet? No. No, no pet here. Can't have a pet.
Wait. Isn't there a no-pet policy?
Yes. Hey, you can't just barge in here.
Apparently you can.
Pet is close.
[Exclaiming]
What? Nothing.
Just practicing for when I find pet.
[Whispering] Monkey. Monkey, no. Down. Down.
Down. No, no, no!
Why you yell when I'm right next to you?
No reason.
[Bottles tinkling]
[Exclaiming]
What?
Milk is sour. Don't drink.
Bingo! Now, move, please.
New game. New game. Hide-and-seek.
Okay, stay right there.
Good monkey.
[Crashing]
Did you hear something?
No.
[Rattling]
How about that? Nope.
[Toilet flushing]
If you're asking, I didn't hear that either.
Move self.
Oh, that.
I unroll it ahead of time. Helps when you're in a rush.
Where the pet? Where the.... Can't find pet nowhere.
Very strange. Nose does not lie.
Well, that was fun.
Next time we'll have to do it at your place, okay, lvan?
[Miss Plushbottom singing]
Miss Plushbottom.
Oh, no. That's trouble.
Monkey! Oh, Mr. Monkey.
If I find pet, you are ewicted.
E-what-ed? Evicted!
Good to know.
Oh, no.
Oh, that's a big drop, Ted. Don't look down.
Rickety's okay. Just as long as there's no wind.
Oh, sweet mother of science!
Cramp. Cramp again. Cramp. Cramp.
Darn that cramp.
MlSS PLUSHBOTTOM: No, no, no, no.
No, these are not the colors I wanted.
I told you to match them to the City Opera.
[Singing a note]
MAN: They are the same colors, Miss Plushbottom.
They may look like it...
but do they sing to me?
You are fired
Hey, she fired us in song. It still hurts.
And now, I must have a soak.
[Operatic music playing]
Okay, fellows, last stop. Everybody off.
No, paint? You've got to be kidding me.
Who leaves eight open cans of paint lying around?
[Screaming]
Of course he went in there.
Oh, boy.
[Whispering] Monkey. Monkey. Over here. Come, monkey. Come on.
Monkey, peekaboo. Peekaboo.
Monkey!
[Chattering loudly]
No, no, no, no, quiet.
What's that?
Do yourself a favor. You're going to want to put the cucumbers back on.
Ivan!
I knew it!
You are red-handed with pet!
And while we're on the subject...
I think you have a serious pest problem in this building, lvan.
I mean, don't you spray for jungle animals every spring?
I specifically remember such language in my lease.
[Whispering] Let go. Not helping.
Look at my walls!
And you! Moi?
You hired a monkey to paint your apartment.
How do you sleep at night?
He is your monkey! Now what do you say?
Come on. That could be any guy in a yellow suit...
silk-starched collar, black spotted tie.
Ivan!
[Shouting]
Well, that was fun. Bye-bye.
Sorry. My fault.
Lovely apartment. Could we borrow your window? Got to go.
You are no more 17-B!
You are kicked from building.
Just to be clear, though, the monkey's kicked? Not me?
Get out!
Foot caught.
What am I going to do with you?
Come on. We're almost at the museum. Act natural.
Try to blend in.
[People Watching by Jack Johnson playing]
We're all people watching
Come on.
The other people watching we
Nobody told me what to do
I can't stop breaking all the rules
And I'm just people watching
Oh, that tickles.
He's grooming me. Everyone's doing it.
They're getting small monkeys and.... Hi.
Never mind. So cute.
[Ted groaning]
I forgot all about them. Quick, monkey, this way.
Okay.
Oh, no.
What have they done?
These are cheesy, ridiculous.
Okay, that's kind of fun.
REPORTER: How much longer is this going to take? Let's all be patient, please.
Ted will be more than happy to answer all your questions regarding the giant idol.
Yes, but where is he? Oh, boy.
I just spoke to Ted. He's on his way. Run, monkey. Run.
Quick, in here.
What am I going to do?
This is beyond bad.
Hey, monkey.
Quiet. Monkey. I said, quiet!
Well, we gave it a shot, didn't we?
I mean, huge monkey statues, they come and go...
but parking lots are forever.
TED: Excuse me. Would you please....
Oh, look who's back.
Would you stop that? I have to concentrate.
And he's wearing a yellow suit. What, is he officially the golden child now?
Monkey, put that down. No.
Oh, I've got problems. Oh, do I have problems.
Glorious day, Ted has problems.
What am I going to do? What can I do?
There's no way around it. I have to tell Mr. Bloomsberry the truth.
The horrible... Horrible?
...awful... Awful?
...devastatingly crushing truth. Devastatingly crushing?
His enormous idol looks like it came out of a cereal box.
Wow, that must be a huge box of cereal, or....
It's only three inches tall.
Yes! This is great. What a great day for parking lots.
Oh, my body.
Hey, a dollar.
Yeah, it spins. Fun, huh?
[Knocking at door] CLOVlS: Ted? Hello?
Oh, there you are? What's with that?
Clovis, I can explain.
I should hope so because that is a lot of yellow for one man.
You see, it's.... I thought you were color blind.
I can see that.
Oh, before I forget, here's a bill for my services.
$2,000? What's this for?
The exhibition stage for the Lost Shrine of Zagawa.
Mr. Bloomsberry? Watch this.
MAN: Behold the Eighth Wonder of the World!
[Mr. Bloomsberry laughing]
Clovis whipped it up. Doesn't it take your breath away?
More than you know.
Okay, let's get down to business. Where's the shrine?
What's that?
MAN: Behold the Eighth Wonder of the World!
But, Ted, that can't be the idol.
I don't understand. We saw the picture. The statue is huge.
I'm sorry, sir, but it is.
I've been trying to tell you, this is this.
Oh, Ted, what are we going to do?
Okay, here he is, everybody. Right this way.
The man of the hour. Our hero.
No pushing. We'll all get a chance.
Hey, Ted, they can't wait for you to tell them...
about the massively gigantic, huge, enormous idol.
Don't be shy. Right up there. Come on.
Now's not the time for butterflies, Ted. Speak right into the mike.
You're good? You checked that that's working, right?
Louder. Any questions?
Over here. Can you tell how old it is?
JUNlOR: Sounded like "old," but what she said was "big."
How big is it?
TED: You know, I'm not sure about that.
Could you tell us, was it difficult finding a boat big enough to bring the idol back?
No. No, didn't have a problem on the boat thing.
It.... Yeah, it fit nicely.
MAN: Excuse me. What was your first reaction when you saw the idol?
I was emotional. Teared up pretty much instantly.
Guy, guys, guys, let's focus here. We're here about the idol.
So, Ted, where is the idol now? Yes, yes, yes, where is the idol?
It's.... It's close. It's.... It's very close.
JUNlOR: What else we got? Come on, guys. Fire away. Keep them coming.
Excuse me. Rumor has it the idol has magical powers. Is that true?
Well, that all depends. Yeah, good one. Now, ask him where it is.
Was it difficult to find? WOMAN: Is it made of solid gold?
And how big is the idol? Are you going to write a book?
What about a movie deal?
Oh, no, that's not a good idea. It's not? Why?
Not the Apatosaurus formerly known as the brontosaurus.
I'm sorry. No, don't!
This is very common when you come back from the jungle.
Bad idea! Monkey! Monkey, no! JUNlOR: Can we please get back to questions...
regarding when we will actually see the idol?
No, no, no! Monkey! No, no, no! You can't leave. Ted!
Please, no! Ted, before you leave, please....
No!
Ted, where is the idol?
Okay, careful. Careful, that's the linch pin to the whole left leg.
Oh, no!
Wow, I didn't see that coming.
Oh, Ted, we're doomed.
What's a monkey doing here?
I guess we should just take a picture. Quick, get a picture.
Well, seriously, Ted, can't say you didn't try.
I mean, you did bring back a monkey, just not one anyone cared about.
Okay, bye-bye. Hold on!
You're locking me out?
Cabs are right behind you.
Perfect.
Oh, no. No, no, no. No. No, you don't. No.
This is not going to work.
Here it is, "Animal Control."
This better work.
WOMAN: Hello, Animal Control, How can I help you?
Yes, could you send someone over to the Bloomsberry Museum right away?
We have a very dangerous monkey.
Describe dangerous, sir,
Oh, he's frothing at the mouth.
He's got teeth like Ginsu knives and crazy eyes.
He's a killer. Listen to this.
[lmitating a monkey]
Put that child down! Oh, the horror! I can't watch!
Sir, we just closed, but I can leave a message,
What am I supposed to do with this monkey?
I'm sure I don't know,
Thank you for calling the Animal Control hotline,
[Dial tone buzzing]
Hello?
You, down.
Okay, listen. I'm only watching you...
until tomorrow, when Animal....
Don't do that. Okay, maybe you're right.
It's late. It's been a long day.
I'm all out of ideas. What do you got?
Oh, this is great. This is a great idea.
I'm so comfortable here. What are we lying on here?
Is this goose down? It's so comfy.
No, this is a concrete park bench.
That's what it is.
Did I mention that it's a cold concrete bench? Very cold.
[Thunder clapping]
Hey, shake all you want, monkey. There's no bananas in there.
But if you find a 40 foot idol, let me know.
Eighth wonder of the world. Right. What a nightmare.
Oh, no. No, no, no, don't look so satisfied with yourself.
The whole reason we're sleeping out here is because of you.
Yeah, I could be in my nice, warm bed right now...
showered, teeth brushed...
instead of sleeping out in the cold with a monkey...